Facts of Friendship? | writing is the life-source of my heart?

Friendship?the relationships we all crave, covet and celebrate when it is thankfully within our grasp. But what does friendship entail, exactly? What qualifies a friendship as true, genuine & unconditional, when so much of this world and its inhabitants are illusory. Lately I have been asking myself the same questions regarding my own friendships, hoping to find in each of them a morsel of truth and value that would render its importance validated in my life. Because we all know the reality of those that are not?those relationships that simply take what we have to offer, draining us of the love and energy we give freely.

Those kinds of unhealthy relationships eventually catch up to us, in the form of resentment?until the truth sets us free and we sever ties to prioritize our own happiness when others do not. Sometimes we simply get caught up in our own lives too much that we do not realize the effect we have on others, and all it takes is a quick snap back to reality to remember to make those efforts to nurture all of our treasured relationships. But how we come to such conclusions is the difficult part.

I have especially realized this having to miss several close friends; those who live an ocean apart from me that I am rarely able to see. What I have learned throughout these years is that absence truly does make the heart grow fonder, as efforts to do close the gap of distance and nurture such relationships even from afar. Little means of communicating can make all the difference in allowing distant friends into our everyday lives simply by letting them know they are thought of and missed. Letters, packages, phone calls, emails, texts?communication has become practically effortless in our day and age?so what excuses do we have to lose touch with those we love?

It is one of the hardest lessons we will learn in life, trying to distinguish which relationships to keep, and which to let go. It is a lesson I think I will continue to learning in order to honor the my most cherished friendships and to sever those that are superfluous. We all want authenticity; to distinguish those things in our lives that are true and those that are false. It is simple human nature that not one of us can deny. This week I ask you all to reflect about the friendships in your life that are invaluable to you. Do you nurture them through your honesty and consistent efforts to uplift your dear ones? Are they worth it enough to you to maintain? Do your friendships bring out the best in you, and do you bring out the best in them? The most wonderful of friendships are effortless, because both individuals are selfless in the love they give to better one another?and know the true value of the love they share?of the support they offer?and of the positive effects their love can have. They are the precious few we are afforded in life?the rare gems we discover. And they deserve to be celebrated.

Here are a few excerpts from emails exchanged with one of my best friends in the past few weeks, even despite frustrations and miscommunications we manage to come out stronger and wiser for it. I am so very proud of the way in which we love one another, and how freely we communicate such honesty. How would you feel if you were told such things by your friend, and would you return the sentiment?

?Even from afar I feel your presence encouraging me, loving me, supporting me, nurturing me?you are always present within me. So few people get to feel, embrace and accept such profound love in order to TRULY feel it in their bones?but you do. Because you are loved MIGHTILY. I think sometimes that kind of love scares you because it feels too big, but I think it only serves to soothe you. Its okay for you to accept it. Its okay to not be okay. Its okay to stumble and to to regain your balance. Its okay to just accept that you are loved. I hope that love reaches in and heals your heart in those moments when you fear it may break. You will never be alone, because even by yourself in the quiet of your home, left to fight the demons of the mind?I will be there fighting with you?no matter what.

?I could not be more honored you chose to love me and to share your journey with me. It has made me value not only you and our friendship, but the beauty of life itself as your being in it makes mine all the more precious. I could not be more proud of you for accepting the love and help your loved ones so desperately wanted to offer you, that you made the choice all your own to get better, and to succeed. You continue to make me proud with each and every step you make to enhance your world, by enriching your mind, by strengthening your will, by balancing your choices and championing your challenges.?Your efforts fill me with reassurance, validation, support, encouragement, inspiration, love?something that to you may seem small and trivial can mean the world to me because it brings our worlds together despite time and distance?.and I need that, as much as I need you.

?You are my hero. Your outer beauty is eclipsed only by the radiance of your heart and the graciousness of your soul?the one I have shared with you for the last 6 years. You epitomize beauty in my every definition of it and I hope that you can look in the mirror and see it for yourself?its merely waiting for you to rejoice in it.

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I am thankful for the realizations that have helped me lately to value myself as much as my friends, because I?ve come to know myself even better. ?I?ve come to realize what I have to offer, and what I do offer to those I love?and what I hope to share with them as well. Those are the friendships that will sustain me throughout this wonderful life?and I could not be more thankful for them.

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